Hard
by Stellar Eclipse
Summary: Cloud's gaze settled upon a familiar figure sitting alone at the bar of a hazy pub. He plopped down on a stool beside his comrade with a heavy sigh. Cloud/Leon friendship/something more, implied Squall/?
1. Holding On

_Where's the angst been, you might be asking? Right here. (But just a little.)_

_Disclaimer: dood, _fan_fiction. Kingdom Hearts, Final Fantasy, and the characters and universes therein are the property of Disney and Square Enix. I receive no remuneration for this work; it is a parody and as such utilizes the Fair Use clause of the Copyright Act._

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Chapter 1: Holding On

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Cloud's gaze settled upon a familiar figure sitting alone at the bar of a hazy pub. He made his way through the myriad off-duty restoration workers seated at too-close wooden tables and plopped down on a stool beside his comrade with a heavy sigh. He nodded at the bartender's acknowledgement and motioned his head towards the deep amber-colored drink Leon was staring blankly at and rotating slowly between long, ungloved fingers.

Leon blinked sedately and lifted his gaze at the solid thunk of a shot glass being set down near him, finally noticing he had company. Dull blue-gray eyes briefly scanned the label of the bottle the tender was now serving up, then followed the small push of the half-filled glass towards the blond's waiting hand. "Cloud, this stuff doesn't taste particularly—"

Cloud downed the shot.

"...good." Leon sighed, uncurling his fingers from around his glass and thumping the wide-eyed, breathless blond hard on the back.

"I didn't think you drank," the swordsman gasped. He stared, teary-eyed and incredulous, at Leon, little temperamental coughs occasionally wracking his body.

"I don't."

"Then why...?"

Silence reigned for a short time, then Leon closed his eyes, left hand finding its way back to his untouched drink and gripping it tightly. "..._He_ did."

Cloud considered him for a moment, studying the fine lines that furrowed the scarred man's brow, the tense shift of his jaw. The world-weary expression didn't stay for long, and Cloud was about to open his mouth when Leon abruptly knocked back the harsh liquid without so much as a wince and rose from the bar stool.

"See you."

"...See you," Cloud echoed, a tiny frown pulling on his lips. He twisted on his seat to watch the brunet stride towards the exit, noticing the slight droop to his proud shoulders and wishing he had the balls to go after him.


	2. Giving In

_Well, after much (ok, not so much) provocation from a certain someone, I decided to continue this one. There's one, possibly two chapters to go. Hope this cheers you up, babe._

_Love to Belle, as always._

_Disclaimer: dood, _fan_fiction. Kingdom Hearts, Final Fantasy, and the characters and universes therein are the property of Disney and Square Enix. I receive no remuneration for this work; it is a parody and as such utilizes the Fair Use clause of the Copyright Act._

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Chapter 2: Giving In

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Leon shifted his eyes to the side as the sound of solid, steady footsteps approaching wove its way into his distracted thoughts. He identified the intruder by sound and scent alone and said nothing, did nothing even as Cloud dropped to the ground behind him and leaned up against him, mirroring his knees-drawn position and wrapping his arms around his own legs. Whether he was trying to offer companionship or comfort, Leon didn't know, but the struggle that had been building inside him slowly became a little more defined with the blond's persistent presence. He desperately wanted to ignore the younger man, push him away. He also wanted to lean back, give in, and finally accept the unspoken offer, be it friendship or...something more.

He didn't know _what_ he really wanted.

After a short time, the gunblader leaned forward and rested his chin on his forearms, leaving only their lower backs in contact. "Fourth time in a week. What do you want, Strife?"

Cloud's mouth turned down, and he lifted both shoulders in a small shrug, knowing the other wouldn't really see it. "Keep you company."

Leon made a soft, non-committal noise, fixing his gaze out on the horizon beyond the Dark Depths. The warmth beginning to seep between their bodies made him finally notice the chill in the air, and he curled his cold fingers into his palms and tucked them against his chest. "Why?"

"Thought you might...need a friend," the blond murmured. "That's all..."

Another small acknowledgement, even softer this time.

Neither spoke for several minutes until Cloud's gaze lowered and he broke the silence with a few quiet words. "I think...maybe you need to let someone in again." He hesitated for a moment. "Maybe you...need to let him go..."

The gunblader stood abruptly, and Cloud quickly pushed off the ground and pivoted to face him.

"Look, you can't keep living like—"

Steel blue eyes narrowed and the line of Leon's lips tightened further as he wheeled about to glare at the younger man. "Watch me."

"...He's gone, Leon. Zack's gone, too, and they're _never coming back_," Cloud stressed, heightened emotions beginning to affect him as well. "You need to—"

"Why?" Leon nearly growled, flinging one hand out to the side in a frustrated gesture. "Who? You?"

Cloud could almost feel the other man's hackles rising. He wasn't even trying to hide the tension in his posture anymore, and the blond reflexively straightened, his own muscles stiffening in defense. "Why not?"

The quiet retort caught Leon off guard, and he choked on his next breath.

"You deserve another chance...to be happy. And I...I like you," Cloud said simply, seeing no sense in holding back now. "I want you to let it go; let go of these burdens and just live. You think you're the only one to have lost someone? We all have, Leon." He sighed bitterly, dragging a hand through his hair and turning his gaze away.

The brunet stared at him for a moment, then lowered his head, folding his arms in on himself and shifting his weight to one foot with a small sigh. "I don't...think I _can_ let go." _I don't want to. I shouldn't..._

"Let me help you? At least try..." The younger warrior turned back to search the burnt-out depths of Leon's eyes, watching the minute shift of the brunet's irises as his examination was eventually reciprocated. He bared his soul in his gaze, hoping to finally breach the iron shield that he'd felt around the gunblader since the first time he'd laid eyes on him, but there was no response save for Leon's continued silence.

Cloud let out a somewhat patient breath and inclined his head just slightly. It may not have been a _yes_, but it still wasn't a _no_, and that was a good start.


	3. Letting Go

_Disclaimer: dood, _fan_fiction. Kingdom Hearts, Final Fantasy, and the characters and universes therein are the property of Disney and Square Enix. I receive no remuneration for this work; it is a parody and as such utilizes the Fair Use clause of the Copyright Act._

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Chapter 3: Letting Go

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Steel blue eyes began to show clear signs of doubt again, and Cloud shook his head just slightly in the negative.

"You...you helped all these people here. You're rebuilding this world, taking control like you have..." A tiny shudder pressed on the base of Cloud's spine as those words left his mouth, and he closed his eyes momentarily before continuing. "You've taken care of my friends...Tifa...and Aerith...even Cid, so indirectly, you've already helped me..."

"That...someone needed to, I just—"

"I want to help _you_ now," he interrupted softly. The blond extended his hand, re-engaging Leon in that same soul-searching stare. "Will you let me?"

After a moment of being caught up in the sheer intensity of the blue-green irises before him, the hesitant gunblader lifted his own gloved hand, surprised to find that, though the greater part of his mind wanted to refuse this, something in him truly did want this in some way; wanted to not hide everything from the world; wanted human contact again...

If he was honest with himself, he wanted..._Cloud_.

He paused again before actually touching the proffered hand, taking a slow breath as he slid his fingers against Cloud's, past his palm to grip the base of his thumb and wrist lightly. The swordsman did the same, squeezing a little and offering the faintest of smiles at Leon's acceptance before using their connection to draw them both together, heavy boots clunking as awkward steps were taken to leave them mere inches apart.

Leon's frame stiffened at the proximity, that same greater part of his mind screaming for him to step back and guard against this, but then Cloud was kissing him, so gently, just the barest brush of warmth against his mouth, and Leon's eyes immediately closed, long-suppressed instincts clawing their way to the surface and rending any other thought into insignificant shreds. A whisper of a breath parted his lips, and Cloud took the opportunity to move closer and steal that tiny puff of air, tilting his head and tracing the tip of his tongue along the upper curve of flesh, tasting just a little.

"Mh, I..." The scarred man pulled away before Cloud had a chance to do anything further, responsibilities and memories and regrets rushing back at him full force. "Wait...we shouldn't..."

"Leon, shut up." Cloud held Leon's hand tighter between them and threaded his other fingers up into the sable-brown hair at the base of his neck. "Stop thinking. _Feel_..."

He kissed him again, harder this time, mouth already open to push his tongue insistently between Leon's lips, and the brunet couldn't help but give in, couldn't help but submit to his demands. It had been years..._years_ since he'd last kissed or been kissed, and the tastes and sounds and sensations were so raw and powerful and too overwhelming to be ignored, and _god_, it felt good to touch again.

Cloud soon coaxed the other man's tongue into his own mouth and began to suck lightly on it, low whimpers of encouragement coming from the back of his throat and doing their part to provoke the older warrior. Leon released a quick moan and drew himself a little taller against Cloud's body, grasping narrow, belted hips with both hands to keep him from moving away, though the blond's unyielding embrace and soft sounds of arousal indicated quite clearly that he needn't bother; he wasn't going anywhere.

Burning thrills of pleasure and dominance began to arch Leon's spine and he pressed even closer, devouring the younger man's mouth, biting and licking and thrusting so deep into the kiss that he could taste the want and need on Cloud's breath. The blond groaned and let out a rushed "_yes_" as, unbeknownst to the brunet, his hands descended to flex into Cloud's backside, and suddenly Leon realized what he was doing and pulled away with a loud gasp and a shiver, eyes wide and full of mixed emotions. He stepped back slowly, chest rising and falling with each heavy breath, then turned away and bowed his head, pressing a palm to his forehead.

The swordsman gasped breathlessly at the abrupt loss of contact, and he struggled to swallow, following Leon's movement away after a few seconds. He slid a hand over one of the brunet's shoulders as he stepped in front of him, feeling the small tremble of muscle under his fingertips. His gaze roamed over the downcast face before him, and he moved his fingers down Griever's chain to fist the emblem gently.

"Let it go," he whispered. "Let me heal you..."

Leon's brows pinched together, and he started to shake his head. "I'm sorry..."

Cloud sighed, drawing the older man's attention as he leaned in again. He brought his lips back to Leon's for just a moment—a soft touch, a promise—then whispered against the corner of his mouth, "Let me in..."


End file.
